Thursday, April 22, 2010

Still confused, boob or no boob. April 22, 2010

The more you know, the more confused you get.   Ignorance is bliss right?  Oh well, i would rather know everything.   I met with both a plastic surgeon and the breast surgeon.  Another sleepless night.  The plastic surgeon was helpful, made me understand what i can and will not be able to have done in the future.  Pictures actually looked better then i thought.  More on the choices another day, since i wont be having that done anytime soon.

My confusion is, once i told the breast surgeon i was scared and not ready to lose my breast she suggested we just do another lumpectomy, re-excision, and scoop out more tissue and hope for clear margins this time.  Also do more lymph nodes.   If i have clear margins i may not ever need a mastectomy.  Just chemo and radiation.  If i dont get clear margins again, i would have the mastectomy after i give birth with possible reconstruction then.  And in the meantime still do the chemo. Or i can go with the current plan to just have the mastectomy now and lose the boob tomorrow.  I just need to talk to my oncologist and determine if the re-excision is a safe and realistic approach given both the size of my breast and the pathology of the cancer.  
So today i wait and think, and think and wait,  and decide by later tonight what i should do.  I wish i could just sit with all the doctors all at once and have a group decision on what is going on and what is the best solution for everyone then doing all this back and forth.  

On a good note, yesterday Larry and I checked out some more wigs, real hair ones, and i really liked them. And then enjoyed a walk around Newbury street, lunch at Stephanie's, then walked through Boston Garden/Common and where the flowers are in bloom and soo pretty!  Now off to work to relax! hahaha

1 comment:

  1. I support you no matter what decision you make. This journey is going to be a long one and in the end you will be on top!!!! Your boob can be replaced but you and your baby cannot. Love you always and always thinking fo you!!! xoxo

    I hope this post worked...finally I think i figured this out.