Family trip to Dana Farber - results suck April 14, 2010

Since Larry is away... my loving family was there for me today, Sarah, Jesse, Mom and Dad, all packed into 1 small car together! Reminded me of Italy! Half way into the ride Jesse brings out his lunch box, napkin on his lap, enjoys a turkey sandwich and yogurt, and snacks were passed around for everyone! My family is great for some fun laughs in tough times!! First we met the nurse for an hour and then the oncologist for another 40 mins of questions. So yes, the margins were not clean, cancer cells spread out like fingers on some sides and the size measured once removed was 2.2 cm. 9 out of 10 lymph nodes had tumor in it as well. So where does that leave me for options? Well not many. I can have a mastectomy now, within next 2 weeks, then chemo, then deliver baby at about 36-38 weeks, then round 2 of chemo and radiation. Or I can have chemo within 2 weeks, deliver at 32-34 weeks, and then immediately have mastectomy, round 2 chemo and radiation. Either way, I have to have it all done, but also my baby will still be ok.

Surgery and The Days After... April 8th - April 11th, 2010

The surgery went well, very long day, but in the end it went well. We got there around 11am, and I had the radioisotopes injected into me. Waited around and then went to pre-op where I had a bunch of nurses come talk to me, an IV hooked up, which was great since I was so dehydrated from the no food/liquid after midnight rule and heard the babies heart beat. Beating strong. Then around 2 pm I was wheeled into the operating room. Lying on the table, under the big lights, as all the masked doctors and machines beeping surround me, I had my breakdown. I was so good up until then! I wasn’t scared for me, just for the baby. So I cried for a little as all the nurses came over to hold me and reassure me everything would be ok. Took a few deep breaths into the mask and out I was, and baby too, under anesthesia. Bye bye lump! About 2 hours later I woke up barely, but wasn’t ready to see Larry, sorry babe. Soon I heard the doctor say the procedure went well, the tumor was small, about pea size, they removed it and a good amount around it. They also removed 3 lymph nodes, each about the size of a peanut! Soon after the nurse came in and I heard the babies heart beat again!! Strong again! Stronger than mine! I was so relieved. I saw Larry for a little, we exchanged notes and then I felt sick so he left. And I slept for 2 more hours! Again, sorry Larry! I think we are now even for time spent in a waiting room for spouse!

A New Team, A New Perspective Flashback to March 17th, 2010

We took the doctor’s opinion and got a second opinion and went to Dana Farber. Dana Farber is overwhelming in itself. Unlike the first hospital, this place was crowded with cancer patients, all ages, colors, and stages. Each floor had it’s own cancer specialty, but everywhere you looked you knew you were looking at a cancer patient or supporter. This waiting room had a much younger crowd mixed in with the “older” women. Many in wigs and scarves, even some men too.

So we waited our turn and met the surgeon, Dr. Gadd, who explained how her surgery would be very safe of the baby, and the scaring would be minimal since she liked to make the incision around the areola. The surgery will be to remove the small lump and a margin of tissue around the lump. They will check the margins and hope for “clear margins” meaning cancer wasn’t spreading out more in one or two directions and they “got it all”. They would also remove a couple of lymph nodes from my arm pit to test if the cancer cells have traveled into the lymphatic system. Both these will help with the “staging” of my breast cancer. Again, this surgery, even though I will be under anesthesia and receive radioisotopes, will be safe for the baby.

After a quick walk during lunch we met with Dr. Partridge, the medical oncologist who specializes in patients under 42 years old. Even though she was relatively young for a doctor, in her 11 years experience she had seen more the 400 women who were pregnant while battling breast cancer. 400 women in 11years, pregnant with breast cancer in the New England area alone, I guess I am not that unique! She knows what she is doing and that is reassuring. And all I needed to know to make my decision to go with her and the rest of the Dana Farber team.